What Is Permissive Parenting?

When Jack was a teenager, his parents were the coolest. They let him stay up as late as he wanted, go out with his friends whenever he pleased and hardly ever said no to anything he asked for. Jack loved the freedom his parents gave him and thought they were the best parents in the world.

But as Jack grew older, he started to realize that his parents' permissiveness had come at a cost. He had no sense of boundaries or limits, struggled to take responsibility for his actions and had a hard time dealing with authority figures. Jack's parents may have thought they were doing the right thing by being relaxed and lenient, but their parenting style ended up hurting him in the long run.

What Is Permissive Parenting?

Permissive parenting is a style of parenting characterized by low demands and high responsiveness. Permissive parents are lenient, indulgent and do not enforce strict rules or discipline. They tend to be warm and affectionate with their children and prioritize their kids' happiness and comfort over everything else.

Permissive parenting is often contrasted with authoritative parenting, which is characterized by high demands and high responsiveness. Authoritative parents are firm but fair, have clear expectations for their children's behavior and provide consistent discipline when those expectations are not met. They prioritize their kids' well-being but are willing to make tough decisions to ensure their children's long-term success.

Examples of Permissive Parenting

Permissive parenting can take many different forms and can look different from one family to the next. Some common examples of permissive parenting include:

• Allowing children to make all their own decisions without repercussions
• Not enforcing curfews or rules about screen time, food intake or dress code
• Being a friend rather than a parent to their child

Permissive parenting can lead to a lack of structure and guidance that can harm a child's development. While some level of freedom and flexibility is important, children also need clear boundaries and expectations in order to feel secure and learn important skills like self-discipline and responsibility.

The Downside of Permissive Parenting

Permissive parenting can have a number of negative effects on a child's development:

• Lack of self-discipline: Without clear expectations and consistent discipline, children may struggle to regulate their own behavior and make good decisions.
• Difficulty with authority: Children raised by permissive parents may have a hard time dealing with authority figures and following rules in school or other settings.
• Less academic success: Children with permissive parents may struggle in school, as they have not developed the habits, structure and work ethic necessary for academic success.

Conclusion

Permissive parenting can be tempting, as it allows parents to be popular with their children and avoid conflict. But ultimately, this parenting style can hurt children in the long run by not providing the structure and guidance they need to develop into successful, responsible adults.

Instead, parents should strive to be authoritative, setting clear expectations and providing consistent discipline when those expectations are not met. This may be difficult in the short term, but will pay off in the long term with children who are well-adjusted, responsible and successful.

References

• Verywell Family - What Is Permissive Parenting?
• Parents.com - The Permissive Parenting Style: Confusing It with Neglect
• Psychology Today - Strict Parenting: Effects on Kids and Teens

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